Table of Contents
This is the final post from the book If God Is Good by Randy Alcorn. These last two chapters show us how to offer grace to ease others’ suffering.
You can find a listing of previous chapters under the heading Bible Studies in the menu above. Unless otherwise noted, the Scriptures Alcorn uses are from the NIV Bible.
It is my hope that these posts have been beneficial and give you peace that passes our human understanding (see Philippians 4:7).
Finding Grace to Ease Other’s Suffering
Giving Comfort
People need to feel loved. A hurting child needs to feel his father’s arms around him. When the Father is away, he may have written words of love, as God has in His Word. But he may also call on the child’s older brothers and sisters to express his love to his child.
To ignore someone’s pain is to add to that pain. Instead of fearing we’ll say the wrong thing, we should reach out to hurting people. Many times, it’s better just to put our arms around someone and cry with them; people almost always appreciate it when you acknowledge their loss. Yet so long as your heart is right, saying something is nearly always better than saying nothing.
There is a Time for Silence
We often condemn Job’s friends, but we should remember that they started off well. When they saw his misery, they wept out loud. And then for seven days and nights, they sat with him, in silence, wordlessly expressing their concern for him (see Job 2:11-13).
If we don’t know what to say to a friend in crisis, remember that so long as Job’s friends remained quiet, they helped him bear his grief. Later, when they begin giving unsolicited advice and rebuke, Job not only had to deal with his suffering but with his friend’s smug responses, which added to his suffering.
Do Not Avoid Suffering Friends
We should not disappear or avoid our friends who need us now more than ever during suffering. Most of us have seen friends disappear when we most needed them, and without meaning to you we’ve done the same to others.
If you do not want to make a phone call when you hear about someone’s crisis, remind yourself that any expression of concern is better than none. When people lose a loved one, they don’t want to “move on” as if the person never existed. Even if doing so makes them cry, usually they want and need to talk about them.
“Rejoice with those who rejoice; Mourn with those who mourn” – Romans 12:15
We tend to do better at rejoicing. Because we don’t like to feel pain, we tend to ignore others’ pain. However, they need us to become the arms of Christ to them. If we’re not there for them who will be?
Remember to allow the dying to come to terms with it and seek dying grace from God.
Alcorn shares that a man he knew would read one chapter a day from Alcorn’s book Heaven to his dying wife. She spent her last 46 days talking openly about her eternal future. This allowed them to cry and laugh together. After reading the final chapter, they prayed and then she died.
He called their final days together precious. Some things in life are hard to accept, denying, arguing, and complaining will not help. Moreover, those responses keep us from seeing what God is doing and from trusting Him and drawing near in the hour we need Him most.
Comfort In The Body Of Christ
To serve God in suffering we need the companionship of the faithful. Relational tension, anger, broken hearts, and lack of forgiveness can cause great suffering. Alcorn wrote in his book that he and his wife have a friend who found it easier to accept her beloved mother’s death than the rejection of her estranged sister.
Regardless of the cause, those who suffer should seek companionship and encouragement, rather than withdraw.
“Two are better than one…. for if either of them falls, then the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls where there is not another to lift him up.” – Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, NASB
When Suffering Comes
When suffering comes, we should ask God to use it for His glory. Josef Tson told Alcorn “Our first question in suffering should not be, ‘Why?’ But ‘God, what do you want to do in the world through my suffering?’”
When interrogators worked Josef Tson into exhaustion for 10 hours a day, one of his persecutors made a strange statement: “Pastor Tson, when I interrogate people, I am used to feeling their hatred for me. However, you do not hate me. It has become a delight for me to be with you.”
Josef viewed his suffering as God’s means to accomplish God’s purpose. As a result, the gospel his persecutors tried to dismiss, touched them instead.
Impatience with God
Blaming God and others keeps us from suffering’s redemptive aspects. Our impatience with life’s struggles and adverse circumstances becomes impatience with God.
In Job 40:8 God asks, “Would you condemn me to justify yourself?”
Countless people have let themselves fall into the black hole of blame. Blaming God is a dead-end street because in doing so you turn away from your greatest Source of comfort.
Likewise, blaming others doesn’t work either. Those who throw themselves into vindictive lawsuits never find joy. Others seek comfort in the execution of their loved one’s killer. True and lasting comfort eludes them. Anger harbored in our hearts gives “the devil a foothold” – Ephesians 4:27
Don’t Feed Bitterness, but Delight in God
Bitterness metastasizes and consumes our passion for serving God. Refuse to engage in the thoughts and conversations that feed bitterness. Instead, delight yourself in God, His Word, His people, and the privilege of being a forgiven and Heaven-bound child of God.
Recognizing Suffering Has Meaning
Recognizing that suffering has meaning helps us to learn not to waste it. Shortly after speaking together at a conference on suffering, John Piper and David Powlison both learned they had cancer. They formulated 10 points under the exhortation, “Don’t waste your cancer.”
10 Ways Not to Waste Your Cancer
John Piper and David Powlison said, “You will waste your cancer if you:
- do not believe it is designated for you by God.
- believe it is a curse and not a gift.
- seek comfort from your odds rather than from God.
- refuse to think about death.
- think that “beating” cancer means staying alive rather than cherishing Christ.
- spend too much time reading about cancer and not enough time reading about God.
- let it drive you into solitude instead of deepening your relationships with manifest affection.
- grieve as those who have no hope.
- treat sin as casually as before.
- fail to use it as a means of witness to the truth and glory of Christ.”
Find your identity in God, not your illness.
We live in a time when we are defined as disabled, bipolar, alcoholic, ADHD, victims of lupus, cancer, Parkinson’s disease, and nearly everything else. Our condition easily becomes our primary reference point.
Your disease does not define you. Learn what’s necessary, take care of yourself, and live. We would do well not to become preoccupied with the disease any more than with a career, a hobby, possessions, or a retirement program. Moreover, we should focus on Jesus Christ first and foremost in our lives.
We should view our God-permitted suffering as His specific calling to us, and not resent it if He calls others to suffer less. Sufferers commonly ask, “Why me? Why not someone else? Why have you treated me differently, God?”
Comparison Is Poison
We shouldn’t resent but rejoice for those who don’t have our diseases, losses, or issues. We should thank God He knows exactly what suffering and death He’s called each of us to endure.
Early tradition says that when Peter was about to be crucified, he asked to be turned upside down, judging himself unworthy to die upright like his Lord.
Just as Jesus knew the details of Peter’s death, He knows all about yours and mine. Whatever death God has in view for us, it should likewise be a death by which we will glorify God.
God knows how much we can bear. He knows how to relieve suffering and how to strengthen us to endure it.
“No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he’ll never let you be pushed past your limit; he’ll always be there to help you come through it.” – 1 Corinthians 10:13, MSG
This truth applies to every aspect of our lives, including the manner, timing, and duration of our dying.
Discovering Deaths Curse And Blessing
Death, Life’s Greatest Certainty
Death is life’s greatest certainty. No exercise program, diet, or therapy prevents death. Corpses don’t undertake cosmetic surgery. Even the young die from overdoses, accidents, and diseases. Famous athletes and Hollywood stars alike wind up in nursing homes. Suffering and old age are the great equalizers.
NOTE: Remember this book was released in 2009. To Alcorn’s list, I would add Covid vaccines.
David wrote,
“Show me, Lord, my life’s end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting my life is. You have made my days a mere handbreadth; the span of my years is as nothing before you. Everyone is but a breath, even those who seem secure. “Surely everyone goes around like a mere phantom; in vain they rush about, heaping up wealth without knowing whose it will finally be. “But now, Lord, what do I look for? My hope is in you.” – Psalm 39:4-7
We shouldn’t obsess over death. Neither should we follow our culture’s lead in denying death until it thrusts itself upon us. When we fail to face death, we remain unprepared for what awaits us on the other side.
We should live our short todays in light of what A. W. Tozer called “the long tomorrow.” Many who receive a terminal diagnosis experience for the first time the bittersweet blessing of coming to terms with their mortality.
We Can Deny, But Can’t Avoid Death
The last thing most people want to think about is the last thing they’ll do: die. None of us knows the time or place of our death. Neither can we know its manner. And there’s nothing we can do to escape it.
Ecclesiastes 8:8 states “No man has power over the wind to contain it; So, no one has power over the day of his death.”
This statistic never wavers: 100% of people die. Wise people live in light of death’s certainty. In the oldest Psalm, Moses wrote,
“Our days may come to seventy years, or eighty if our strength endures; yet the best of them are but trouble and sorrow, for they quickly pass, and we fly away…Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” – Psalm 90:10, 12
Christians get two opportunities to live on Earth. The first opportunity begins and ends. It is but a dot. The second opportunity will be an infinite line, extending on forever.
We all live in the dot. If we’re wise, we’ll live for the line.
“But in keeping with his promise we are looking forward to a new heaven and a new earth, where righteousness dwells.” – 2 Peter 3:13
Two things stand between where we live now and that marvelous world where we will live forever: death and resurrection. If we never died, we’d never be resurrected. We’d never enjoy a glorious eternity with Christ and our spiritual family.
Therefore, while death is an enemy and part of sins curse, because of Christ’s death and resurrection, it’s the dark passage through which we enter the brilliance of never-ending life.
There Is Something Worse Than Death
Death isn’t the worst that can happen to us; to die apart from Christ is terrible because it ends all opportunity to hope. It’s much worse to deny Christ than to die.
However, for God’s children, it leads to the best. At death, our sin will end, and we’ll be with Christ forever.
Death is not a natural part of life as God intended it. It is the unnatural result of evil. And yet, God has removed the ultimate sting of death, which explains the appropriate sense of peace and triumph that accompanies grief at the Christian’s memorial service.
For Christians, Death Is Not A Wall But A Doorway
Death is not a last goodbye, but a “See you later.” We do a disservice to ourselves and to others when we turn death avoidance into an idol.
“Death is the destiny of every man; The living should take this to heart.” – Ecclesiastes 7:2
Speak openly about death with you’re dying family members. If you’re the one dying, talk about it directly. Read aloud the following scriptures:
- Philippians 1:20-23.
- Revelation 21-22.
- Psalm 23:4-6.
Don’t let discomfort or denial keep you from walking hand in hand with your family through the valley of death’s shadow, where God can comfort and calm fears, where cups can overflow, and where you can celebrate and anticipate God’s eternal goodness and love.
Many people later regret not conversing directly and praying about death and Heaven during their loved one’s last days here. Don’t be one of them. It would be wise to use every day of our lives to prepare for the day of our death. Death isn’t easy to accept but God remains sovereign over it.
Final Thoughts
If you’re considering whether you should believe in God, the problem of evil and suffering is only one issue, don’t overlook the others. A great deal of evidence argues for God’s existence. What humans generally recognize as right or wrong, has no explanation or objectivity without God.
The more we store up our treasures in Heaven, the better we’ll prepare ourselves for death. Jesus said the treasures we store up on earth won’t last.
“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” – Matthew 6:19-21
Our choice of where to store treasures dramatically affects how we face death in the afterlife. If someone lays up treasures on earth, every day he gets closer to death, he moves away from his treasures. To him, death is a loss.
However, those who lay up treasures in Heaven look forward to eternity. They move daily towards their treasures. Since their heart lies with their treasures in heaven, to them, death is gain, for it will bring them at last to what they most treasure.
Our Faith is Precious to God
God considers precious our faith in Him to fulfill His promises of future deliverance from evil and suffering.
In Malachi 3:13, NKJV, God says to His people, “Your words have been harsh against Me.” The Israelites had said,
- It is useless to serve God.
- What profit is it that we have kept His ordinance, and that we have walked as mourners?
- Those who do wickedness are raised up; they even tempt God and go free. Malachi 3:14-15, NKJV
But then, we’re told,
“Then those who feared the Lord spoke to one another, and the Lord listened and heard them;
So a book of remembrance was written before Him for those who fear the Lord and who meditate on His name.” – Malachi 3:16, NKJV
Heaven contains books with detailed historical records of all earthly lives (see Revelation 20:12).
Each of us has a place in these records. Obscure events and words originally heard or known by only a handful of people will become public:
“What you have whispered in private rooms shall be proclaimed on the housetops” – Luke 12:3, ESV
Your acts of faithfulness and kindness, your private conversations affirming your faith in God during suffering find full documentation in God’s books. He will reward you for them in Heaven.
Jesus said, “Anyone who gives you a cup of water in my name, because you belong to the Messiah, will certainly not lose their reward.” – Mark 9:41.
Although our full reward awaits, the delay will make the reward all the richer when it comes, and it will cultivate our faith as we patiently wait for God to fulfill His promises.
Biblical faith in God is informed by the past and focuses on the future.
Those who question God, fixate on the present and past: “It is futile to serve God. What did we gain?”
However, God in Malachi 3:17-4:2 speaks of the future:
- “They will be my treasured possession…
- I will spare them…
- You will again see the distinction…
- Surely the day is coming…
- The Son of righteousness will rise…
- You will go out and frolic like well-fed calves.”
Faith means believing in God for the future, that he will deal with evil and suffering, judge the wicked, and reward the righteous.
“Without faith, it is impossible to please God because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek Him.” – Hebrews 11:6.
As has been said many times throughout Alcorn’s book, no truth seeker should reduce his consideration of God’s existence to the single question of evil and suffering.
Though it is one of the most difficult issues, it’s not the only one. The future will fully vindicate God’s righteous integrity and the wisdom of His plan. As God culminates His plan of the ages, the heavens and Heavenly inhabitants will cry out,
“Great and marvelous are your deeds,
Lord God Almighty.
Just and true are your ways,
King of the nations.
Who will not fear you, Lord,
and bring glory to your name?
For you alone are holy.
All nations will come
and worship before you,
for your righteous acts have been revealed.”
– Revelation 15:3-4
Telling yourself the truth about suffering can help you deal with it. Consider that suffering:
- is limited. It could be far worse.
- is temporary. It could last far longer.
- as we’ve seen in these chapters, produces some desirable good.
- can make us better people,
- can reveal God’s character in ways that bring Him glory and bring us good.
- God can see all the ultimate results of suffering; we can only see some.
- When we see more, in His presence, we will forever praise Him for it.
- He calls upon us to trust Him and begin that praise now.
The Christian Worldview
The Christian worldview best answers the problem of evil and suffering, but God doesn’t force faith on anyone. If you insist on rejecting God, then what can I or anyone else say that will make a difference? You feel angry with the God you claim doesn’t exist. Denying Him is your revenge. However, you are the one who will end up suffering for it. Whether you bow to Him now in love or later in judgment, every knee will bow to Him.
“At the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.” – Philippians 2:10-11
Set aside all other arguments and study the person of Christ. Read of His life in the gospels, the books of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. Listen to His words. Can you look at Jesus and not be broken? Can you gaze on the crucified Christ and still resent God for not doing enough to show His love?
We can know for sure we’ll go to Heaven when we die:
“I write these things to you who believe in the name of the son of God so that you may know that you have eternal life.” – 1 John 5:13
In the end, Jesus Christ is the only satisfying answer to the problem of evil and suffering. Alcorn states that throughout this book he’s tried to avoid putting too much weight on any single argument. But about this he is certain: the best answer to the problem of evil is a person, Jesus Christ. In fact, He is the only answer.
As for myself, that is why I named this website “Passionately Loving Jesus.” Jesus Christ is my Hope, my Savior, and the Truth. He is the only Answer and is returning soon.
In this world of suffering and evil followers of Christ have a profound and abiding hope and faith for the future. Not because we follow a set of religious rules to make us better but because through inconceivable self-sacrifice Jesus Christ has touched me personally, deeply, giving me a new heart, and utterly transforming my life.
Because He willingly entered this world of evil and suffering and didn’t spare himself, but took on the worst of it for my sake and yours, He has earned my trust even for what I can’t understand. I and countless others, many of whom have suffered profoundly, have found Him to be trustworthy.
He is “The alpha and the Omega… the beginning and the end” – Revelation 22:13
When it comes to goodness and evil, present suffering and eternal joy, the first Word and the last Word is Jesus.
So once again I must ask the most important question you’ll ever answer:
Maranatha! Until next time, I am Passionately Loving Jesus, the Anchor of my Soul.
